IMO a ‘reasonable’ understanding. But CERTAINLY better than most. This is in reference to Tatania. On a personal level, she? Seems to be open to being a bit ‘humanistic’ and that is a good thing! I find it interesting that there is the separation of IDEALISM and HUMANISM coming from the same person.

CBM; ***The separation you're talking about does not develop from the cradle, but you're right that it develops pretty early.***

I might raise some question regarding your assessment. People seem to be much more “biological” than what most want to acknowledge. For the moment let’s KEEP heredity out of this, DOSEN”T apply to what I am addressing.

ADD, ADHD, AUTISM, and other maladies that ‘come’ with the package. These are NOT learned, but rather are pretty much in place at birth. Biological meshes with genetic.

Humans as well as other animals come “wired” with “propensity’s” of interpretation and behavior. A well known in depth study of a comparison between Ted Bundy and Chuck Yeager that was done some fifteen years ago revealed that these two had MANY very similar cognitive processes in the way they interpreted their environment. As it was pointed out, it was like when they came to a ‘fork’ in the road, one of them went left and the other went right. The components of fear of consequence or guidance by empathy showed to be a parallel.
Explains a little bit as to why SOME persons seem NOT to learn from experience. To them NO wrong was committed. End of cognition! Are there people like among us? You betcha, and a lot more than people want to admit.

Take the school shooters, and the workplace shooters, and when their past is put to scrutiny you will find PLENTY of evidence of them being a bit erratic and strange most all their lives. They did NOT just suddenly go TILT.

And what percent of parents are knowledgeable about how best to deal with these issues? A fraction of a percent at best is my estimation.

CBM; ***Infants experience needs and expect those needs to be met immediately; their reality is entirely about what they experience and what they want. Small children begin to understand that their wants and needs will not always immediately be met (and sometimes react quite stridently to the realization), that they are competing with others (ditto), and that they will not always get what they want; they begin to understand their impact on others in terms of the consequence to them. From play with peers and their interactions with family, they begin to be able to predict and anticipate the feelings and reactions of others. By about 5 or 6, they should be able to anticipate how an action will make another feel - though learning to think before they act is still a challenge.

One not uncommon feature of the abuser is that he or she was often abused in childhood. It's extremely complex and depends on a lot of factors - the extent to which the abuser as a child found pleasure or pain in the acts, the extent to which the original abuser maked an effort to seduce and persuade rather than compel, the extent to which the original abuser rewarded desired behavior with attention and warmth, the age of the child at onset, etc., etc. The abuse most often makes the victim feel guilty, isolated, and mistrustful, but sometimes a victim will resolve the emotional conflict by identifying with and emulating his abuser - better the wolf than the prey. While most abuse victims do not grow up to be abusers, most abusers were themselves abuse victims.***

Every thing you say here rings so TRUE when played out in real life, and needs to be repeated over and over to get others attention. Please EXCUSE me for hitch hiking on you, but what you present is very important for others to have a better understanding of.

CBM; ***It's not that they are completely incapable of empathy (that's a whole nuther set of disorders, and quite scary when you run into it), but that their interpretation of their victim's feelings is warped, partly by their own experiences, partly by their desires (humanity is quite gifted at rationalizing behavior).***

Having spent much of the past ten years making a study of PD’s, (Personality Disorders) and the role they play in interpersonal relationships from partners to child rearing IMO your statement,

“”(that's a whole nuther set of disorders, and quite scary when you run into it),”” is an understatement.

It is easy to relate to why the subject is so AVOIDED by so many. Take FTE for instance, (Failure To Empathy) It is hard to fathom for many that such a thing can exist in a human, yet it clearly does in some instances. I have encountered some of these persons, and your statement of it being SCARY is IMO an understatement.

CBM; ***Jackson is a curiosity. My guess is either he himself was abused or he is in fact innocent and is lost in some delusional process where he fancies himself a kind of forever-child Peter Pan. There is so much other bizarre behavior: the infamous baby at the window incident, the obsession with making himself look "white", that whole thing about marrying Elvis' daughter and then outbidding former friend McCartney to buy up the Beatles' song rights. The man just isn't thinking the way the rest of us are.***

Again, worth repeating. ***The man just isn't thinking the way the rest of us are.*** And an Amen to that! Clearly there is a disconnect from convention that reason and/or logic does NOT provide the answer. Interesting also is the take that the different theorists have in the attempts to explain it all.

Regards,